Anxious pooping!

For a person like me, social gatherings are always difficult to handle and there are two things that are bound to happen to me in such scenarios. Number one, I would go into a shell and the entire time I’ll end up staring at the floor with minimal eye contact with the others. Secondly, I’ll become the joker of the party and everyone might start liking me. Well, except for this one place where we all go and I behave like a person who has been tortured for a couple of days straight. Hospitals. The clean smell of a hospital along with the doctors and nurses with their stethoscope and gloves makes me want to run away screaming.

I’ve been dreading my visit to the doctor today for the past couple of days so much so that whenever the thought comes across my mind, I’ll get a strong urge to poop. I read up about it online during the weekend and it’s termed as anxious pooping. Am I the only one who gets this feeling? I used to get this feeling before as well, like when it was progress report day in school, when I have to meet/call someone I didn’t know for the first time, when the instruments started playing before our marriage ceremony and every other irrational fears I had. I mean what is it that a doctor can possibly do to make you feel miserable EVEN before the meeting itself? I’ll break it down for your understanding.

1) Preparations.

You want to create a good first impression as if it’s your first date. The thought of the doctor judging you by the size of your nails, the adequate amount of ear wax in your ears and how your breath smells makes you fidget during the entire time while in the doctor’s office. Not to forget if it’s your first time visiting a new doctor, you would really hope the doctor is polite and doesn’t make you uncomfortable.

2) Investigation.

Somehow the entire conversation with a doctor feels like an interrogation even though I’ve never been interrogated. Doctors don’t bother if a particular question is too personal or weird before they ask it because it’s their job to know everything related to it to reach an informed decision about your health. But answering truthfully to a doctor about your embarrassing conditions and awkward bodily function is quite tiring for the mind.

3) Godlike.

The intimidation to be around a doctor is pretty intense for a person like me who has grown up watching T.V shows like E.R, Grey’s Anatomy and Dr.House. The feeling of being an absolute nothing in front of a doctor makes you exceptionally quiet and scared for life.  There are times doctors have felt weird around me just because I wouldn’t stop staring at them. Doctors are the real life celebrities you would love to be close to but you wouldn’t know how to when you actually meet them.

4) Bad News.

I’m not a sunshine to be around when I’m visiting a doctor. Every ounce of positivity that oozes out of my body dries up immediately when I see a doctor. I imagine the worst case scenario in my head over and over again until the doctor tells me I’m fine. And if god forbid I need some help, I become so hesitant to get one that I’ll make excuses to do it some other time by trying to get out of the place immediately.

With all the above symptoms before every single doctor visit, I guess it’s pretty normal to feel like pooping thinking about going to the doctor’s today. Before my limbs starts behaving on it’s own and my mind becomes numb, let me go take a shower and get ready. Until next time, have a good day/night y’all! 🙂


Author: Lakshmi Geeth

I’m an ordinarily odd person who is pleasant to talk to. When I’m not trying to be funny, I would be lying on the floor bawling my eyes out. I write weird stories, real life snippets, traumatic and dramatic memories along with doses of unsolicited advices. 🙂