Spiders Vs Humans

Before I get into today’s hot topic, I would like to inform you that the doctor’s visit went successfully yesterday where I asked valid questions to the doctor without feeling intimidated and I refrained myself from staring at the doctor for more than 30 seconds. At least I tried. Even though the doctor’s assistant kept assuring me that my blood pressure was pretty low as a result of being, in her terms “teeny tiny” the fact that she kept telling us how small I’m as a person wasn’t the best feeling to start with. I’ve noticed that everyone here gets a little chirpy and active during the summer and I, on the other hand, got so tired after the doctor’s visit that I had to drink a whole bottle of water after I reached home to be able to move again.

Speaking of home and summer, during this time of the year, like I previously mentioned in a post, is the time when all living creatures comes out of the comfort of their home,  looking to get some vitamin D or play volleyball in the beach while sipping on a pina colada. Unfortunately there are many living creatures, we as humans would never want to see. If seeing snakes outside our community was a problem then seeing insects inside our house is equally disturbing. However,  seeing the number of spiders that has invaded our house at present is beyond my  threshold of patience. Spiders or any other insect for that matter doesn’t make me jump up the couch like a little girl or how they usually  show it in “Bollywood” BUT, it definitely gives me the creep. Yesterday while I was sitting with Bigshot watching a movie, I found a standard sized spider just hopping through my thighs as if it’s crossing the San Francisco bridge. I screamed and let out a grunt before getting up and scaring the half asleep Bigshot. As the official spider/insect buster of this house he has started hating his part-time job now only because of the fact that the work load has increased drastically over the last one week. Even though the number of spiders we are flushing down the toilet is increasing, the number of spiders that are showing up out in the open has doubled up. It’s like the whole spider community as a whole is rising up and protesting our insensitive killings. You would imagine these insects and spiders would be scared of you when you approach them but they don’t give a flying ass about us humans. Even when Bigshot gets near them, they are like “Touch me, I DARE YOU!” Instead of running away from him or putting up a fight.

The day I see a humongous spider in this house is the day we will be saying goodbye to this apartment forever. That is a sight I would not hope even for my enemies. In fact, there are so many things we want to run by the apartment office and figure out in a proper plan to continue staying where we live but since we are two adults who doesn’t bother to behave like adults, it’s never happening. Because believe it or not, we stayed in this house without lights in the dining area and the washer area for almost two months before realizing the need to change it. Okay, that last part is a straight up lie. We decided to fix the lights only because we had people coming over. The point is before this house comes under the “The planet of the spiders” situation, we need to make some decisions. And as I’m writing this post I can see a minuscule spider on the corner edge of the floor avoiding any kind of moment for the past one hour.

Before summer is over, our intention is to speak to the office and get this horrible mess fixed, but until that happens, I’ll be using my vacuum more often and Bigshot will continue flushing them down the toilet.

Author: Lakshmi Geeth

I’m an ordinarily odd person who is pleasant to talk to. When I’m not trying to be funny, I would be lying on the floor bawling my eyes out. I write weird stories, real life snippets, traumatic and dramatic memories along with doses of unsolicited advices. 🙂